Tears Of a Sinner

The sky was dark, the moon was bright and shining through the tree’s. The moonlights glow broke through the tree’s and onto Hanabi’s face. She kept her face down, her eyes hidden under her bangs. She held some flowers delicately across her arms, taking her time to her destination. The tree’s opened up, embracing the moonlight and exposing a wide Cemetery. A gentle breeze blew across the open landscape. She wore her robe loosely, letting it blow with the wind. Hanabi continued to walk to a grave site, still walking rather slowly. Almost hesitant, not wanting to be here.



Arriving at a very bleak gravestone, it remained bare with no love, no attention, and no spotlight. It was sitting under a tree, distant from the others. Hanabi sat down and placed the flowers in front of the headstone.




Hanabi gave a forced smiled her eyes closed and spoke softly, a slight crack in her voice.



Hanabi began to talk about her experiences so far since the last time she came by. Her voice still cracking and her eyes becoming glossy. A few sniffles here and there were heard but not too excessive. She talked about how she was apart of the Hokage’s squad with two other people. One with a funny name and a very pretty girl. Both were skilled in a form of taijutsu. She really liked both of them, now going on about the mission she went on with Taco. She started smiling a little more while sniffling still. After her story of the mission, she grew silent. She gritted her teeth and placed her hands on the ground, her head lowering more to her chest.

Kanara absolutely hated the graveyard. Too many bad memories of stern looking Uchiha clan members that expressed their condolences as she stood in front of the grave that not only contained her father, but also her sister. But where else should she go? Nowhere else was she as near to her deceased family members then here. Nowhere else then outside maybe. After all, Kanara was willing to bet that her mother still was waiting ourside, lurking, to catch her off guard one day. But for now, this didnt matter. All that mattered was that she would get this over as soon as possible.

Entering through its front gates, she forced herself to ramain calm as she went through the rows of neatly arranged graves. Shinobi, most of them. Some giving their lives defending the village. Some simply having died of old age. Regardless of the reason, they all would find their final rest here. Together with her sister. Her grave was the fist one she managed to approach. Standing in front of it, looking over the white marble, her lips would be trembling for a few seconds, before she would lower herself and picked up the dead flowers on top of it, whispering: "Hey big sis... I got things to tell you...-" Pausing for a few seconds she would inhale in a painful motion before she continued "I got promoted, you know? I also have some new abilities. Maybe i can even kill...-" Stopping mid sentence adn looking away from the grave she would bite her lip before she wiped away some tears out of her eyes. This didnt seem like the right place to tell that she might be able to kill their mother. Even less so, since her sister had been a forgiving person that would have stopped her mid sentence, likely by laying a finger onto her lips and hugging her until the pain went away. Pain that not even her abilties could heal or make go away.

Looking back at the grave she would simply conclude: "I miss you, big sis... i really do." As she placed a new bouquet of fresh, vibrant red flowers, those being her sisters favourite kind, before she stood up and went over to her fathers grave, being only a meter away, with stiff steps, her fists clenched. Repeating the routine of sitting down, staring at the grave for a few seconds and taking away the dead plants, she would begin to speak to him as well. "Hey dad... you know... a lot of stuff happened since last time... i hope you arent mad for not visiting more often."

In her mind, and she hated herself for it, she was mad at her father. He had been a shinobi that was supposed to be on the same power level as her mother and still he didnt manage to save her sister. Obviously it wasnt his fault, but still she couldnt help to feel that way, regardless of irrational it was. It wasnt hate however, more disapointment. Maybe it was somthing else as well. Survivor-syndrome someone once called it. Making it out when her father and sister didnt. After all, to her it was a valid question. Would it have been better if she died that fateful day? Better then living all those years hurt, frightened and alone? IN Kanara's mind it was. It was so much better. But she had gone too far then to stop now, she thought. All she could do was to take the pain and try to not let it get worse.

Stanidng up and stopping her sentence, after decorating the grave with a set of flowers once more, she would take a look around until she spotted a figure in the disance next to a tree and a rather weird, or out of place looking grave. Looking at her for a few seconds, she clenched her fist as she finally decided to have a closer look at them once they exited the graveyard.

Turning around she would make her way over to the exit, and upon reaching adn walking through it, she would wait for the stranger to eventually come out as well as she tore a sheet of paper into painfully small peaces. Iz was a way to manage stress for her.

As Hanabi wiped her eyes, she placed the flowers in front of the grave stone. She stood up and swiped her eyes, nose and mouth. “I’ll see you soon.” She turned around and walked towards the exit, suddenly feeling like the temperature got colder. Her eyes drooped to the floor, taking her time through the cemetery. Hanabi looked around just enough to notice some new flowers on a grave. She looked up to the exit of the Cemetary and noticed a woman standing there, maybe taking her time to decompress and gather herself together.


Hanabi headed up the way, wiping her eyes again. She looked at the woman, seeing as she looked familiar. She shrugged it off and continued walking. After a few steps, she stopped and looked back. “Rough day?” She looked the woman up and down, noticing her ripping up some paper. Maybe it was a habit that she had when she got anxious. Hanabi turned her body and walked back to the woman and offering a hand out as a greeting. “Hanabi… My name is Hanabi Inuzaka…” She gave a soft forced smile.

Kanara would be watching the stranger from afar, how she was placing the flowers, bidding her farewells adn finally repeated the steps that Kanara had taken earlier, those being in the direction of the exit, where she was waiting. Mustering her as she passed her, Kanara would be quiet until Hanabi turned around and asked if she had had a rought day to which she replied: "Seems like we both had one. Your cheeks are still wet. Swiping doesnt really do the job well..." Raising an arm and extending it towards the other woman, holding a neatly folded and clean paper tissue she would wait until it was accepted or declined before she looked at teh offered hand and finally shook it,  giving out: "My names Kanara..."

Pausing for a few seconds adn taking in a stuttering and painful breath, Kanara would look towards the sky before she said: "I guess you also lost someone but...-" Pausing in the middle of her sentence she would clench her fist and slightly gaze back towards the graveyard as she gave out: "... but lets talk somewhere else. I dont like this place at all..."

Hanabi nodded to Kanara and took the tissue, softly wiping her face. “Kanara.. Pretty name.” She said before thinking to herself that the name sounded familiar. She didn’t give it much of a second thought as Kanara began talking again. Nodding slightly to her statement, hanabi agreed to go somewhere else other than this damned graveyard. “Yeah.. How about a drink?” She said with a soft smile. “I think we both might need one.” For the first time in a while, Hanabi could sort of enjoy that smile. She cried out her pain, the only place where she could feel like it was validated. Her eyes glimmered from her tears, the wind softly picking up against them. Subtle thunder crept across the land, lightning dancing along the skies. “We should probably get going now if you wanna take me up on that offer..” Hanabi gave a soft chuckle before starting to walk fast to the bar, occasionally looking back to see if Kanara was following.

Kanara would shrug once she heard the comment about her name. To her it was just there. Not that she was able to change it to begin with, she thought. But it still was nice to mention it. Nodding ever so slightly she would give out: "Thats nice...". Naturally it woudlnt take long until her newfound conversation partner to continue the sentence that had been started earlier with a question whether or not they wanted to catch a drink. Kanara certainly could use one right now. "Sure... lead the way..." she finally would give out to the other woman.

Following her to a nearby bar, she would go inside with her, or rather after her and take a seat at one of the chairs, where she would order a lemonade-whiskey cocktail. "So... who did you visit?", she would finally ask after a short break while she was wating for her drink, in order to get over the awkward silence that had fallen over the two.

Hanabi gave a small nod to the woman and headed towards the bar. On the way there, it began to start drizzling with small rumbles of thunder. “It’s starting to rain.” She looked up while walking and held her hand out. She looked back to Kanara and gave a wave to follow her. Now running towards the Bar, she stepped inside and gave a small shake of her head. By the time they had arrived it was pouring down. The skies were dark and everybody had gone inside.

Hanabi waited for Kanara to come in before finding a seat and sitting. Kanara had ordered hers and Hanabi just asked for a simple Sake. She gave a nod to the server and glared them down, following their path. Returning her gaze back to the woman, she had sparked up a question. “Ah.. I..” She gave a nervous chuckle. “I visited my Dad. Yukii.” She stared at the table, now debating if it was okay to really admit who her father was. Despite whether Kanara was an Uchiha or not, she didn’t want hate around her. “Who did you visit?”

Once inside the bar and having received ehr drink now, kanara would take a sip, taking in the bitterness of it, mixed with the sparkling lightness of the lemonade. Keeping it in her mouth for a few seconds before finalyl swallowing it, she would finally look over to Hanabi and give out: "I see... Well. I have been visiting my dad too." Taking another long drawn sip she would think. It was somewhat fucked up. How her mother had done this to her. Ruined her for so long. Forced ehr to live in fear. And that not even because of the so famous and well known knack of the uchiha to traumitise their children just to keep en strong, or even make them stronger, but instead just for herself. Just so she could claim something she was so eager to get.

Shaking her head slightly, Kanara simply would give out: "What a joke..." more to herself than anyone else before she added in a louder, stronger voice: "And my sister too. I dont come there often. I hate how it feels. What it stands for..."

Hanabi gave a small nod to the woman, acknowledging what she said. She grabbed her drink and gave a small bow as a thank you to the server. She popped the bottle open and took a sip. This sip turned into rather large gulps. She put her drink down and gave a loud exhale from how much she drank. About half the bottle had already been drank by the time she was done. She didn’t really like to visit the graveyard but her dad was probably the closest thing to her. He died when she was young yet their relationship was great. She gave a small sigh, trying to understand why her own mother really took off.


She looked to Kanara and slowly blinked. “Me too…” She swirled the sake in the bottle, staring at at the movement. Hanabi was more tired than anything. She didn’t feel anything from the Sake but she liked that about it. Doesn’t hit right away but later down the road you really feel it. At that point she’s usually at home. “It’s sad to say my dad is the only one I really confide in yet he’s 6 feet under..” She looked down, her gaze becoming sharp and the light fading from her eyes. “All because of the Uchiha’s…” She muttered under her breath. Hanabi’s vibe went from gloomy to violent in a matter of seconds. Taking a moment to really come back to, her vibe changed once again to gloomy. She shook her head and drank the rest of what was left in the bottle. Hanabi raised her hand to order more.

It felt like a while since he sat down and relaxed without worrying about expectations, his clan members, or the village. It's been a long since he just hung out with friends or his family. He is studying at such late-night hours that it is pretty gloomy. This is the first time that he has stayed out this late. He was surprised to see that the library was open at this late hour, but he did not complain he was able to study for longer. But it was pretty late, so he chose to get up and leave and go home. He had a mission the following day he had received a letter about it, so he needed to rest before the mission day. This was his second official mission for the village, and he was pretty happy about it.

As he stepped out of the library, he noticed the night air was chilly, but he didn't mind. In his opinion, he liked it. Taco decided to look up at the sky to see if he could see if there were any storm clouds or anything to see if tomorrow it would rain or anything, but as he did, he saw that; he saw a weeping sky as the rain fell upon his face. ' this is comforting for some reason. The sky weeps, but yet it shows strength, yet it also shows calmness. this was a beautiful sight to be held .' He decided to take the long route to his home since it was such a good night out, he wished he could train, but he chose not to since he had a mission in the morning, and the rain might make it hazardous to train in the rain, especially at this hour. His muscles were sore from all the training he's been doing and the fight the other day when he had to take Hanabi to the hospital. " Man, the other day was crazy that Ren guy was fierce to fight, but I don't like how he fights. He hides behind clones a lot ." while talking to himself out loud, the rain kept pouring down. It felt gloomy out, but he found comfort in the sound of the rain. The streets were relatively empty, and most shops were closed by now, but there were still some people around at this time going about their businesses. The rain was lightly falling upon his skin and his head. He didn't use an umbrella. He thought it felt comforting as the rain fell on him.

Taco slowed down a bit more, remembering his past, that he may not have lost anyone in his life, but the burden he carries with him daily is taxing for his young age. His father expected him to master all forms of taijutsu and be the strongest one. It is a heavy burden for him to hold this promise to his father, ' the promised father has instilled in me, and the expectations of my clan members are significant as the leader; they expect great things from me. This is something I don't know if I can deliver upon, and our great leader also chose me to be on his team; this is something that I don't know if I can stand up to their expectations. This is all too much for me. Even lord tengoku thinks that my anger can hurt my allies. I'm scared of myself, of what I can be and do... .' As these thoughts went through his mind, he passed a small shop open late. Most are closed on this strip. He hadn't drunk sake in a long time, so he went in for a bit to take his mind off things. For a second, he knew it was a bad idea since he had to get things done; but he went in otherwise. When he stepped into the shop, he noticed someone that looked familiar. A closer look, it was his friend hanabi. He smiled for a second; then he saw someone else with her. Didn't he recognize ' who she is? ' he wondered, but he ignored the question. He started walking up to hanabi, saying her name once and a while with a big smile on his face showing his k9 teeth. When he got close enough and saw her look over, he put a hand on her shoulder to scare her " can I join you, my friend, on this gloomy night? ."

While talking with Kanara and ordering more sake for herself, she continued to drink like there was no downfall. As she threw back her 3rd bottle, she exhaled once more, her face getting a bit flushed now. She wiped her mouth, glaring at Kanara. She was indeed an attractive woman, especially for an Uchiha. Maybe beauty was an Uchiha thing as well. As she stared into the others eyes, she jumped up from the sudden hand on her should. “Eek!” She made a slight scream and looked up to see her teammate, Taco. “O-Oh. H-hello.” Seeing his amber eyes again made her feel something. Maybe they were like the sunset and she just liked them. She was getting a bit tipsy but now wasn’t the time to figure out why she liked him.

Hanabi sobered up a little bit from being startled and gave him a wave. “Yeah..” She slid moved closer to the wall, freeing up the seat she was in. “How is your night so far?” She asked before asking for another drink.

Kanara would continue to listen in to the other uchiha in disguise before her word fell onto uchihas. Shrugging ever so slightly she would look at Hanabi as she answered: "Uchiha, senju, hyuugas, Every time the same stuff. Doesnt matter which clan it is. They are all fucked up in one way or another. Some dont show it openly...", before taking another sip from her glass. She knew that she wasnt able to hold the Uchiha clan responsibe for the deaths of her family. The only two things she could hold them accountable for were that they saved her, and that they hadnt really given her support. At least not the support she needed. Following the days after her sister and fathere were killed, many had offered to train her in order to get revenge. Noone had even had the prospect of being safe, or the one that a young girl uch as herself needed psychological help more then anything now and love, in their minds. Surely the uchiha were efficient. But they also were often efficient assholes.

Looking up once she heard her drinking partner call out in a sharp tone, her eyes would go over the new arrival in a rather desinterested look before she asked: "Another one for our meeting of the anonymous alcoholic? Thats grand", before pulling up a barchair for their new drinking partner. Tapping twice on the counter and pointing at her glass before forming a "2" with her fingers, before she asked him: "So one question beforehand... what kind of problems do you have? I wanna know what im drinking for before ill pass out."

Hanabi looked down towards the table before opening another bottle of Sake and drinking some. ‘P-Princess..?’ Her face grew redder and she shook her head. “I guess if we’re telling our sob stories, buckle up.’ She let out a deep sigh, sake present in her breath.

“My dad committed suicide because the Uchiha clan pushed us away.” Hanabi began her story of why she was at the grave yard. “I went to visit him today because he’s the only person I can confide in. 6 feet under and he’s my only one.” She looked down at the bottle, tapping it a few times. Hanabi moved her head up, looking upward as well, blinking a few times, trying not to cry. “I was born of the Uchiha Clan but I only possess some of their blood. I’m also an Inuzuka.. I don’t claim the Uchiha name due to what they did to me…” She paused for a moment and readjusted herself in the seat. “They dragged me through mud.. Watched me cry as others belittled me. Ren was one of the kids who took part..” Her eyes became watery as she spoke. “The scars on my back are proof of what they did to me. Used me as a dummy, used me for anything.” She looked to the side, at Kanara. “They made my father be ashamed.” Her eyes travelled back to Taco. “I grew up with this for 16 years.. never getting better, only getting worse.” She made a fist and began squeezing the Sake bottle before releasing, not wanting it to shatter. “And now Ren gave me another one.. A painful reminder that they will always be there to shoot me down no matter how hard I try. I was hit, beaten, used as a maid and worst of all, my mother didn’t both to stop them.” She chuckled a little bit before continuing. “She let her own daughter suffer so she could live a good life. She didn’t even try and save me.. She ran away from the house and I haven’t seen her since.” Hanabi grabbed the bottle again and downed it quickly. Scars were present all along her back and arms near her shoulders. A burning rage burned through her heart, let alone her soul. Not wanting to speak about it any more, she redirected the turn to Kanara. “What about you.”

Listening in to their storries, Kanara really could relate to them. After all, they all were united by some kind of trauma that connected them, something tha tmade them choose the path they were walking on right now, that being to sit in a bar and to talk about their traumata. After all, why delete a memeory, when one could wipe out the entire harddrive. It was exactly this reason that made Kanara open and and tell them, after putting a hand on their shoulders in an acknowledging way: "Now this may be hard for you two now, but i forgot my money at home." Stopping for a few moments to let it get to them, she would add up: "You know what that means. But i know that you two are strong and wealthy enough to get my tap as well, right?"

And Kanara really meant it. Hanabi carried an inner strength with her that was greater then she likely realised. After all, if Kanara managed to stick around long enough, then she would as well, and Taco carried himself with the pride of a senju that might have enough money to pay for her drinks as well. Regardless of that, there still was teh fact that they had opened up after only a drink. Shrugging slightly she would give out: "For me... well. My sister got killed and my father too. In front of me. I was only a child back then."[/b] pausing for a few seconds, she would take another sip from her beverage and continue: [b]"First it was my dad. You know, i remmeber screaming because there was so much blood. On the walls... on the floor... We even had a black couch and i could see it red on it. THose lifeless eyes staring at me and his lips. As if he wanted to tell me and my sister to run. But you know... they didnt speak again. Then ti got my sister. Choked until she died. I saw her right next to me, every little struggle she made until it was over. Do you know that bodies still twitch after someone is dead? When they really want to so something? But yeah..." Pausing once more and looking away in order to wipe some tears out of her eyes with a quick movement of her hands that looked like she was simply going over her nose she would continue in a more quiet tone. "And then... they took her eyes. YOU know, they butchered her like a pig for her eyes. Just because she... well. Yeah."

By now Kanara felt bad again as well adn finished her drink as well with a rather large gulk before she brought out: "Well i survived... but yeah. my mom is still out there somewhere and likely wants to kill me too. But it is what it is. Looking to Hanabi, Kanara would give out: "I ... well i can heal your scars if you want. But it would be painful. Really painful. and it wont heal anything in the mind. I am not smart enough for that."

Hanabi agreed with Taco’s sentimental comment at the end of his speech. “Aye. Let us be stronger and be better than was once us before. The past has its name for a reason. It has passed us and we shall prosper from it.” She held her last bottle of Sake up and put it next to Taco’s, her hand wavering a bit. She was obviously getting tipsy and she couldn’t quite keep her bottle straight. A slight few ‘clinks’ were made before Hanabi stood up, wobbling a little bit. “I think I should go ho-*hic*me.” She Ended up sitting back down from the immense weight on her. Looking to Kanara, she shook her head. “I don.. need it. *hic*” Now looking to Taco, she gave a chuckle that soon turned into a laugh. Maybe she had too much to drink. “Would you mind helping *hic* me home?”



—Exit Thread—

Exit thread not motivated to post in it anymore